Simon Says...

... "Travel" ... cos that is the theme on the Simon Says Stamp & Show challenge this week... and I am late entering... this tag has been half done on my desk for a yonk and a half so I thought I would have a little play to put right the wrongs of last night... Oh yes, indeedily, I have been in the wars again! So... I was sitting there, chattering away on the phone, like you do... and I noticed it was getting a bit dark. So, I gets up, goes and puts the cooker-hood light on... and... BANG!!!! There was a mahoosive explosion (ok, a loud bang but bear with, I am traumatised) and the lights went out, the phone went off, the microwave started bleeping at me and basically, I was left, standing all on my ownsome in a very dark house!


Now, I am not stupid *well, not really*- I have always prided myself on being able to change a fuse, rewire a plug and generally do a bit of DIY. (I can even change a wheel on a car!!) Anyways... the fuse box (or what I thought was a fuse box - it is actually a circuit breaker box **ok, I am a little bit stooopid**) is high up on a garage wall. And... there was no power to the garage. Aha, methinks, I will grab that handyily left torch on my way in. Yes, I was prepared, a torch that worked.. the only drawback was... the garage is full of, for want of a better word, "stuff". So, having moved several tonnes of "stuff", finally I managed to get to the ladder. Then I realised that the ladder has its very own mind and really doesn't like being pushed about by a woman. Said ladder was also too tall because I had had to open the garage door to move previously mentioned "stuff" and now... I couldn't get the chuffing garage door to shut. Pathetic female that I am, I was trying to push the door up and back to close it.. nope, wouldn't shift at all. So, ignoring the mardy garage door, I finally managed to extract a step ladder from behind more..erm... "stuff". And... then spent several hours (ok minutes but hours sounds better and believe me, it felt more like days) switching between cussing like a docker and crying like a moody toddler. I kept trying to put the breakers back in... oh no, they were having none of it. So, I basically turned into Basil Fawlty and started shouting at them... I told them, in no uncertain terms, that if they did not go back in then they would be out of there... and... they must have listened because... they stayed in! Hurrah and thrice!!



Then I had to tackle the garage door... and it still wouldn't budge, so I resigned myself to the fact that I was going to have to go and ask our next door neighbour for help. But, alas, he wasn't in! So, I went to the next house, knocked on the door... no reply! I could hear their telly so I reckon they had done a quick double shuffle behind the sofa so they wouldn't have to be subjected to a mascara streaked, cobweb covered, wailing, cussing mad woman. Well, I had a sudden flash of inspiration! I would try and shut the garage door from the outside!! And it worked... however, a few seconds just before the door slammed shut I remembered the following things: 1) I was barefoot, outside, in the peeing down rain, 2) if the garage door shut, it meant it was locked 3) if the garage door shut and locked I would, in effect, be locked out of the house because all the other doors were locked and I didn't have a key 4) Grim wasn't going to be home for three hours and 5) how would I ever live all of the above down if anyone found out? lol So... I launched myself at the door and thank the lordy above, the original ladder (the one that I had hefted out of the way in my first hissy fit) stopped the door from closing... phew close call or what!



Anyways... today I have an egg on my head and it is sore (the edges of roof beams are sharp!) My back feels like someone tried to remove all the muscles and then changed their minds and rammed them back in again without a care for where they should go... and the top of my arm keeps twinging... another trapped nerve. Next time... I am just going to light a candle and sit in the dark til a man comes along to help me... ROFL (am kidding!! although, it does sound like a good and honest plan rofl) Right, am offski, tis a VERY special Sunday Stamper tomorrow with an extra special guest setter... oooh, am off to make my entry!! TTFN

Hels x